Log:Tin-Man Unicorn Attack
| Tin-Man Unicorn Attack | |
|---|---|
Ugly Christmas Sweaters | |
| Participants | 23 December 2017 Czci comes by with Christmas presents and Dielle ends up terribly relieved he says yes to a promotion. |
| Location | |
| Dielle is cleaning up some of the Aspire. There's a fire in the firepit, and five kittens curled up in a kitten-pile, napping on each other. They're a bit bigger than last time Czcibor saw them. Meanwhile, the sweeping is going on. Dielle's wearing leggings and a skirt over them, and Uggs, and a sweatshirt that's got some college football logo on it. It's too big for her, so it comes almost down to her knees and the sleeves are rolled up. She seems to be in a good mood, but it might be the pile of cute near the firepit.
The Polish source of those kittens, so accustomed to traveling by air these days and getting in through cracks and keyholes and lack of draft-stoppers, is actually physical today. Actually walking. Actually sucked it up to put on his token limb instead of the less comfortable (but infinitely less creepy) regular prosthetic. So he beeps in the keycode and slips inside, shrugging out of his greatcoat and unslinging his satchel. Today he seems to be dressed for the season more or less, since his outfit consists of snow boots with removable ice spikes (which he toes out of), heavy jeans, and a ridiculous stupid Guns & Roses ugly Christmas sweater. ( https://images.backstreetmerch.com/images/products/bands/clothing/gnr/bsi_gnr268.png ) "Hey," he calls across, voice mild and pleasant, padding across the floor in thick wool socks, carrying his satchel. "Don't know if I'll see you on Christmas, so I brought you stuff today..." When he gets over there, he digs in the bag and starts taking boxes out, wrapped in Star Wars themed paper.
Dielle smiles at Czicbor and puts her broom down. "Crap, the only thing I have for you is news, which I'll tell you later. How you doin', Kowal? Ain't seen you for a few days. You know we changed over monarchs, right? Or were you there last night? I get so damn rattled at havin' to speak in front of people that I don't always register who's there."
"Hah. You don't need to get me anything," Kowal says, grinning. There's a flat-ish lightweight box, a small-ish kinda-heavy box, and a middling-sized lightweight box, all of which he hands over-- the bigger, lighter boxes in one hand, and the heavy one in the other. "And one of these I'm HOPING you think is fun instead of offensive, really, and if it's offensive you can throw it in my face and scowl at me and I'll put up my Mask so you can punch me without breaking your hand. So maybe don't open that one until you gimme the news." He glances down at the snoozing kittenpile and his expression gets gooey for a second before he wrenches his attention back to Dielle. "Uh, the biggest box is just catnip and cat toys." Then Czci takes a breath and lets it out. "Yeah. I re-swore and everything, I just couldn't make it to Court. Sorry about that."
Dielle says, "Oh, good, I don't have to feel bad if most of it's for the fluffbutts!" She takes the packages and is surprised by the weight of the small box. "Do I have to wait to open them? Never mind, I'm gonna wait anyway, I seriously love that whole anticipation thing, for Christmas, anyhow. My present to you isn't nearly as much fun, honestly. And it's not really a present. Wanna come have a seat? The kittenpile should be wakin' up soon, and they'd love climbin' all over you."
"Well, at least the flat box you should open now, because it's a Christmas themed thing and if you like it you should be able to use it before Christmas too," Czcibor says matter-of-factly, "and if you don't like it, then you should be able to take it out on me right away." There's a crooked little grin after that last, but then he lets out a quick puff of an uh-oh breath at the 'not a present' version of news, and abso-fuckin-lutely sits down next to the kittens. Their little needle-claws will LOVE his ugly sweater, he's positive, and that's More Than Okay because they're soft little balls of love, even if they're definitely bigger than they were. After a second, he notes, "You can also open the heavy one, because it's good to have handy, I think, if you don't already have some."
Dielle grins and sits on the floor near the kittens, and starts tearing into the big box. Her eyes light up at all the kitty stuff and she says, "The fuzzballs are gonna /love/ this." She starts poking through the catnip and toys and such-like, enjoying them in lieu of the sleeping kitties, although they're starting to wake up. Slowly. She looks up and says, "Well, it's more contingent on your agreeing, but I need a Second and I was hopin' it would be you. If you're agreeable."
Kowal, possibly to his credit, only blinks at the offer as he starts stroking the soft little ears of one of the three kittens who'd been living with him. "Even though I haven't been around much for the past week? It's been personal stuff, but I also haven't been air a lot, which means I've been easily contactable if you needed me-- I've been trying to do that..." Another pause, and a bit of a chagrined look, and he adds, "And even though Isolde made me Master Healer?" He frowns slightly, then brightens. "Actually, being your Second would work out really well with that position, since a lot of it has to do with keeping track of available Greenies to work with the other groups and assign them as needed to, say, Harvestmen missions..." Kowal shakes his head abruptly, holding his hands up. "I mean, I'd be delighted to, absolutely. You can definitely use a hand, and I've definitely got the experience, and I can definitely advise on strategy if you need it, and... all the other stuff we talked about when I joined. So I absolutely accept. I just think maybe we should get communications tokens made or something so you can reach me even if I'm in the Hedge or being air or in a no-cell-reception area."
"I'm all for the communication tokens. I know Billy Ray is working on something like that. It's not a sinecure. You get to be a person who decides if someone goes from recruit to full member, for instance, and if I'm not around, you make decisions in my stead. Plus, if anything happens to me, you're next up. Although, at least you've got the Second postion in the only subgroup that I know of where there's two of them, so at least if something happens to Isolde, there's someone else and...I may be thinking too much. But if you want it, it's yours." Dielle's babbling, and looks a little nervous, lest Kowal turn it down. One can tell: there's speech patterns and she's kind of shredding a bit of wrapping paper.
For all that Czcibor's incredibly fluent -- colloquially fluent, even -- in English, it's also not his first language, and sometimes it shows. He looks a little blank at the word 'sinecure', but takes in the rest of what Dielle says without any distress. "That's fine. And I'm also actually already on the lookout for someone else to take my place as Master Healer, since most of the time, I'm most useful as a healer while actually in the Hedge. As far as the rest of what you said-- that's literally all stuff I'm practiced in and comfortable with. Except obviously I'd prefer nothing happening to you." A beat. "Boze moj! Open up the flat box, already! And what's a sinecure? Is it a type of communicator?"
"Naw, it's an easy job, given too fast, usually," answers Dielle, brightening up. She starts opening the flat box, curiously, but taking her time with the tape just because she's that kind of person. Pain the ass, that is.
"Ohhhh," says Czcibor, face clearing. A beat, and then his brow furrows as Dielle starts slo-o-o-o-o-owly opening the flat box. "You're doing that on purpose!" he accuses, overdramatically, pointing and everything. Which, naturally, is when the awakening kittens startle the rest of the way awake and immediately start climbing up his sleeve and up the rest of his ugly sweater, and he starts laughing and cuddling them and trying to rearrange them ineffectually.
Which, of course, distracts Dielle, who then watches the kittens for a few moments because CUTE!!!!! Then she finishes opening the flat package, and looks at the sweater therein. ANd laughs her fool head off while hugging it.
There's massive kittening, yes, which means Czcibor also misses the rest of Dielle opening the present, but he glances back in time to see her face transform, and he gives her a HUGE shiteating grin before degenerating into laughing his ass off right along with her, half in relief and half in thoroughly enjoying her enjoying his dumb joke. "Yessss!" he gasps out, "oh good you LIKE it--"
Dielle says, with some dignity, "Ugly sweaters are the best thing about thrift shops. I love wearing them just to see people's faces when I do." Damn unicorns are so strange! Meanwhile, one of the kittens starts biting Czc's earlobe.
Biting said earlobe turns out not to actually be much fun for the kitten, because its tiny teeth really only dent it a little bit, so Czci picks it up and puts it on top of his head where it can play with his wiry hair. He's grinning so hard at Dielle, and then -- and then -- that grin gets a little bit shy, and he laughs and looks down at the kittens paying more attention to trying to get the things off his own ugly sweater. "I also figured, you know, Rudolph is the leader reindeer who literally lights the way for everyone else..."
Dielle says, "Hey, y'never know, I may someday get proper glowy. Or just my nose. Man, that'd be funny. Nose glowin' like a disco ball and the rest of me just reflecting." She thinks about it, then shakes her head. "Naaaaaaah."
The tin man smirks. He's honestly-- he's honestly so much more clearly and obviously still significantly part human, at least in personality, outside the hedge. So much more emotive. To some people, the difference is jarring. But his face, out here, at least when he's not trying to hide his emotions, broadcasts them like a beacon. "You reeeeeally don't need a glowy nose, no." He leans forward, placing a kitten on Dielle, then tips his head a little and smiles. "Open the last box," he says. "It's a practical present, like I said. And since we're going to be spending more time looking for trouble, thanks to Charlie, it might be helpful."
Dielle takes a moment to cuddle the kitten, kissing it on the top of its head. Then it climbs up her sweatshirt to sit on her shoulder, while she carefully unwraps the small, heavy package. "Man, this is the BEST!" she proclaims, her whole face lighting up. "Thank you, Kowal! I'm hoping these won't come in useful, but I'm pretty sure they will." She doesn't hug the bullets, but only because it might discombobulate the kitten.
Hugging bullets is a very confusing action, to be sure. But discombobulation of a small sharp thing with surprising heaviness is much more dangerous for fleshy skin, it is very true. Kowal just grins again, looking very pleased. "Good good good. You are very, very welcome." Then he claps his knees with a resounding clank, which causes a mass kitten exodus at the sudden loud noise, and they skitter and catch at his sweater, and mostly climb up over on Dielle. The one that got caught yowling and hanging, stuck by its claws to his sweater, he carefully detaches and it joins its siblings. "Anyway, I have some more ridiculous cheer to distribute. As always, tag me when you need me, and I'll check in with Billy Ray about those communications thingies." He stands up, smiling so much, then carefully leans to give Dielle a hug amidst kittensplosion.
Dielle carefully hugs Kowal back, while trying to reassure the kittens that no, the world isn't exploding. Yet. "Thank you, Kowal. You've distributed a great deal here, including some peace of mind. It's weird how upsetting it is to think of leaving the Harvestmen with no one in charge if I get decommissioned, as Vorpal put it."
"Yay!" is actually legit the word that comes out of the Pole's mouth, face set in this huge open grin, and he claps (much more lightly) his hands together for a second, rocking back on his heels. "Okay. And yeah, but it's also upsetting to think of you getting decommissioned, so please keep being careful," he says, slinging his satchel over his shoulder again and then moving to shove his feet back in his boots and pull his coat back on. "I'll see you soon! And happy Christmas, Dielska~!" Then he's out the door, lighter on his feet than any tin man has a right to be. | |
