Log:Fungus-Brained Bitch vs. Flea-Bitten Bastard
| Fungus-Brained Bitch vs. Flea-Bitten Bastard | |
|---|---|
| Participants
Agnes the Aggrieved, Candice the Comforting and Count the Catalyst |
26 August 2017 Everything is fun and games until you hit rocks at Agnes' shop... |
| Location
Mercy Plaza Parking Lot and Rooftops | |
| Mercy Plaza (Formerly known as The Freedom Center) was built some time ago, and without any real plan. It was probably a couple shops with wide driveways between them, before those drives got filled with other stores, which means that they are all pressed against one another, but their rooftop's and storefronts are mismatched and of different heights. Some time ago, the owner of what was then called 'King Laundry' started construction of a rooftop garden, but never really got further than stacking a whole lot of supplies up here to get beaten on by weather for the next decade. Count however, has started again, and while not too much has been done, there is a bit of a foundation to it now, and a large rough square of grass sod has been laid out, an island of greenery amongst the rooftops. Even more Recently, a flightly moth has installed an inflatable kiddie pool up there, and has stuck some flamingos on the 'lawn'. Now Candice has been up here before, and knows all about the little bit of green-land atop the roof of her motley's territory, but why... why would Agnes be up here? Well her store is only a few rooftops down. maybe it's coincidence? maybe it's because Count was playing golf with some rocks and she heard some thunks on her roof and went to investigate? Maybe she's trying to get a good view of Count with her binoculars?! Who knows!? The beast is currently sitting in the pool, watching the sunset, wearing a cheap pair of sunglasses and... well hopefully some sort of swim trunks.
The pretty, strange flower looks over at Count, "We could even get a picnic table and have barbecues and things up here." Always mention the food. She's learning quickly. "And perhaps raise a few dwarf fruits and vegetables."
Hanging out on the roof gives the pair a nice view of the strip mall parking lot; as the sun sets, a delivery van pulls into a parking space right in front of the flower shop. 'Love Me, Love Me Not' is painted on the side -- ah! That's what she's been doing. Agnes has been out, making deliveries. Strange that she would do that herself -- although given her disposition, maybe it's not a stretch to imagine that no one would want to work for her and that she has to do everything herself. However, when she gets out of the van, she carries something along with her that looks like a first responders medical kit. Buh? Why would she..? As she strides toward her shop, she comes to a stop. There's a rock. A golf-ball sized rock. SHE KNOWS WHAT HAS BEEN GOING ON HERE. Count and Candice cannot hear here from this distance but they can see that she opens the store door with a BANG and storms inside. She comes out again, sans medical kit, and picks up the rock. Gets closer to the laundromat. And then throws it as hard as she can toward the roof!
-> >> Agnes to Here << <-=============================================Rolled 6 Successes for an exceptional success. < 2 3 3 4 5 6 8 8 8 8 9 9 > ================================-> >> Dexterity + Wyrd 9-Again << <--> >> Agnes to Here << <-=============================================Rolled 7 Successes for an exceptional success. < 2 3 4 4 5 5 6 6 6 7 8 8 8 9 9 10 10 > =======================-> >> Dexterity + Athletics + 6 9-Again << <-Yes, Mention food and get Count's attention, because the man is a glutton for it, food, flesh... excess. Really, why the fuck isn't Count spring?! Perhaps he's just good at hiding his pain. There has been a little drinking, a martini glass half filled with something neon pink floats on what looks like an iceberg with a flat surface, steaming in the summer half-light. The Scent of the Devils Lettuce also hangs in the air, and it seems like the time of golfing is long past, and now it's just chilling and talking. The Beast is nodding to Candice, thoughtful. "Yeah, Imma have to get some detailed information about how much this rood can support, might get costly, but with Lulu and Cian's shops, we can connect the roofs, some ramps, and steps, balconies..." because none of the connecting rooftops are the same height. The beast looks over towards Candice, smiling at the girl, watching her with heavy lidded eyes, gleaming gold in the sunset, probably thinking something lascivious. He reaches for his drink when... /CRA$H/That rock comes soaring, braking through glass and ice both, sending shard everywhere and jabbing a knife of glass into his palm. Suddenly the water is swirling with red. "FUCK!NG$H!TB@LLSMOTH3RF@CK3R!" Count's voice ringing in the air, is followed with a spash of water and the beast is on his feet in an instant, stumbling forward out of the pool and to the edge of the roof, looking around wildly, and then he spots Agnes. When he see's her his eyebrows go up and his lips peel back from his lips. "YOU GOTTADMNED CUNT!" He Shouts, for the world to hear, loud enough for a noise compl;aint "THIS IS WHY YOU'RE GOING TO DIE ALONE TO FUCKING...." and then he looks down and actually SEES the glass sticking out of his hand, and all the blood. "Oh Christ..." and he disappears back over the edge again "Candi, can you get my first aid kit from the bathroom?" Unfortunately the first aid kit he owns is a bit depleted...
Crash! Candice can't help it, she lets out a girlish shriek at the sudden projectile weaponand broken glass, falling/ducking to her side even as the usually discreet panicles in her hair start rapidly blooming and budding, pinks and purples and greens appearing as she looks around with wide eyes. Count's shouting... actually seems to calm her down. After all. he seems to know what's going on, so she puts a hand to her heart, breathing-- then smelling, her eyes going to Count's hand. At his sudden call to her, she blinks, nods, and stands, bunching her skirt with one hand so it doesn't impede her as she heads down, "Don't you dare take out the glass until I get back!" She warns Count. It won't be long until she /is/!
"You both very bad people! Be quiet!" Agnes is too mad at Count to even notice that she's been chastised by Mrs. Wong and she's still shaking her fist at the stupid Beast. "MAYBE I WILL TAKE A BUNCH OF ROCKS AND RUN IT THROUGH YOUR DRYERS, HUH?! HOW WOULD YOU FUCKING LIKE THAT?! HOW ABOUT I-.." But then she notices his hand. And the glass. And the blood. And this? Immediately flips a switch. I mean, she's still mad but it is reduced from a fast boil to a simmer. "Well shit," she says before turning and heading back to the flower shop. What? That's it?! No apology? No checking to see if he's okay? WHAT IF HE BLEEDS TO DEATH?! God, she is the worst. Except she isn't. She's just sorta bad. She re-emerges with the aforementioned medical kit and trudges back toward the laundromat. "I'LL BE RIGHT UP," she shouts. "TRY NOT TO DIE IN THE MEANTIME." For her own personal satisfaction, she tacks on a muttered: "..prick."
"YOU FUNGUS BRAINED, DONKEY FUCKING..." Woah, he's a little dizzy now, and sort of misses the rest of what people are saying, because he's just sort of staring at his hand, and the bright crimson that is gushing from the wound, staining the glass and the grass below. The beast slumps onto the grass, and puts his back to the pool, which is, at best, a wobbly sort of support, this pool was meant for children ages 6 and Up after all. How does one even get to the roof from the Laundromat?! Well first you need to go through the EMPLOYEES ONLY area, which is mainly a concrete stairwell with a folding table, microwave and a couple of plastic chairs that Count has been told looks like the Foyer to an Armenian Sex Trafficking Ring. Then, up the stairs to a BLACK DOOR that leads to... hell? No, It's a large apartment, about the same size as the Laundromat below, with a crazy elaborate kitchen... and Death. So MUCH DEATH. The walls are covered in Taxidermy and Bone Sculptures, displays of mummified things, many of them, to fae eyes, that came from the hedge. Things crafted from hundreds of bones, bizarre and macabre. Is that a shrine with a skull on it?! What the fuck Count?! Still, not on the roof. The roof Access is in the ceiling, behind the door that one comes in. There's a trap door, and a ladder, that finally leads up. Candice, going to Count's bathroom sink, will find a first aid Kit... (or bump into Agnes on her way up) but Count's first Aid kit is in desperate need of restocking and houses about a half dozen too small band-aids, some burn cream and a mostly empty tube of neosporin.
Candice being Candice, she takes the other woman in, notes the first aid kit in her hand, and immediately smiles, reaching to grab the woman's arm to tug her along, "How wonderful! You're here. Please don't throw anything else, you might hurt someone. If you hurt Count again it will make me very sad." Cloying and sweet and drowsy, almost, that's how Candice smells, and her voice is gentle and worried, and the flowers in her hair have fully sprouted, pinks and dark purples and rich blues, and red berries in green hair-- some of which Agnes certainly knows are poisonous, and others blossoms that don't exist in the real world. "I'm Candice. Why are you and Count throwing things at each other? Did you date before?" This can very likely be heard by both Count and Agnes, as Candice starts climbing the ladder.
So she grabs her and no matter how gentle the gesture or sweet her manner, Agnes pulls -- nay, yanks -- her arm from Candice's grasp. "Don't fuckin' t-..." She bites down hard on her words, pressing her mouth into a line and takes a moment to start over in a clipped manner. "Don't touch me. Just .. " DEEP BREATH. "..show me how to get to the roof." She has no reason to be nice to the .. what is she? A Fairest? She looks like a Fairest. Her gut-instinct is to just be foul to everyone she meets -- guilty until proven innocent! But Candice is a /plant/ (well, part-plant) and that earns her begrudging goodwill. Hup, hup, hup, huuuup the ladder they go. It's not easy with the med-kit. This isn't just some first-aid kit that you keep in your medicine cabinet. Nooope. This is the real deal. This is the thing first responders lug around and use when you call them and scream 'MY ARM HAS FALLEN OFF! HELP!' So yeah. Not easy. By the time the pair of them have made it to the roof, Agnes is all irritated again, sweaty and red in the face from the effort of it all. "This is all your fault, you miserable fuck," she gruffs at Count as she heads over to the bleeding Beast. Oh sure, blame the victim. "If you hadn't hit rocks at my shop like the god damn moron that you are, this wouldn't have happened." She sits down in front of him, opens her kit. "Let me see your fucking hand." Candice's question about why the pair of them are throwing things at each other goes, for the time being, unanswered. HRMPH.
The beast is still wearing those '4 dollars from the liquor store' sunglasses of his, sitting on the grass, back to the pool. Those swim trunks? They are black, with an electric green stripe down each side. When Agnes and Candice arrive/return to the roof, his brows furrow behind the sunglasses and the look he gives Agnes is scathing. "Listen you overrated, underfucked twat..." he raises his hand to point at her, and blod goes dripdripdripdripdripdrip and he loses track of what he was going to say, looking at it. She shard is about 4 inches and curved, from the rim of the glass and both wide and deep, but while bleeding, doesn't seem to have severed anything... at least not all the way through. How much has either of them seen the beast without a shirt? I mean there's tattoo's sure, and he's built lean, athletic... but then there are the scars. At least one person has shot Count, multiple times in the left lower abdomen... and then theres... is that a BRAND?! In the shape of a large church key, with a flur de lis pattern at the base. There are also here and there, thin lines that might be from blades, and then other marks like claws. He's like DeCaprio in the movie he finally got an Oscar for. Count does, grudgingly, give Agnes his hand, and then looks to Candice "Hibiscus, darling, make sure this witch doesn't poison me like she did last time... she made... look there was tingling and I was fucked up fer hours."
She plants herself metaphorically near Count, looking first at Agnes now that the other woman is out in the open, and Agnes working. "All right, Count. But I'm sure she'll be the source of your hand feeling better." She assures, looking at Agnes with a warm smile. A pink oleander grows above one ear, slowly unfurling. "Thank you for coming so prepared. I would have made do, but it is nice to have the proper supplies." And then she looks at Count, "Why did she poison you?" Because they might be motleymates, but people don't just go poisoning others for no good reason!
Not exactly. She's just concentrating on the task at hand and -- hey! Why does she have this professional level medical kit anyway? Why does a flower shop owner know how to do this stuff? She starts to clean the wound and it stings but she doesn't give a fuck about that; when Count winces -- as he's sure to do, at least from the initial shock of it since she didn't give him any warning -- she smacks the side of his head and points a finger in his face. "/Hold/ /still/," she hisses. "I'm going to need to stitch you up and if you start flailing around like a fucking pussy, this be a mess and you'll heal with a stupid looking scar like the rest of this shit-show you have littered across your body." Someone has an impeccable bedside manner. Lordy! With a glance toward Candice, the mushroom-lady smirks faintly. "Yes. Tell her why you needed to be drugged." She's about ready to remove the glass so Count's answer will likely determine how much that will hurt.
He squints at Candice, and then at Agnes, looking almost sullen. "You wanna know why she poisoned me?! Because after she tried to sabotage my Laundromat, she assaulted me, and then tried to molest me, right there on the floor, and cover it all up with her hallucinogenic voodoo." Scowl. He is however, keeping still, and generally being a good patient, save for his mouth, and getting smacked in the head. Still, for whatever reason he reaches out and puts his hand on Candice's leg, squeezing her ankle when something or other hurts, rather than let it show on his face.
-> >> Count to Here << <-=============================================Rolled 7 Successes for an exceptional success. < 1 2 2 2 2 3 4 4 5 5 5 5 6 6 7 7 8 8 9 9 10 10 10 > ==========-> >> Manipulation + Subterfuge + 2 9-Again and Rote << <-Candice remains close to Count, running fingers through his hair and leaning on him. Really, she does smell so nice! Warm and sweet and possibly slightly like poppies. "I'm sorry you had to deal with all that, Count." Candice says, sounding genuinely sorry for him. And also rather soothing. She doesn't comment on the grip on her ankle, but she does look at Agnes for a long moment after Count's stunning performance, adding, "I'm sorry you and Count don't seem to get along. If it will be too difficult for you to tolerate, I can do the stitching, especially if you aren't used to stitching someone who might start moving around." A smile-- slightly disappointed smile-- as she looks at Agnes with *such* sincerity, "After all, if one's delicate enough, it shouldn't hurt too much, stitching someone up. And it will be fixed that way, too. I know what it's like to have a bit of a compulsion to fix things, but there's no reason to tire yourself-- I'm sorry. I didn't catch your name. I'm Candice Ellison. I wish we'd met under better circumstances."
"THAT'S" *poke* "NOT" *poke* "WHAT" *poke* "HAPPENED" *poke* "AND YOU /KNOW/ IT!" *poke* *poke* *poke-poke-poke* She drops the bloody piece of glass and then squeezes his injured hand roughly. "Now are you going to stop being a fucking /ass/ and let me stitch up your goddamn palm so I can fucking leave and rid myself of your company or are you going to lie about me some more, you filthy, mangy, son of a motherless.." She stop. Closes her eyes. Quietly counts to three. "You know what? I AM BETTER THAN THIS." She picks at the smaller pieces of glass and cleans the wound again once she's gotten everything out, muttering to herself the entire time. "..you try to be a nice person, you come up here to keep the sonofabitch from bleeding out and what kind of thanks do you get? fucking lies and slander and accusations. as if I would even want to go anywhere near that herpes-ridden mongrel..." It is very tempting to just leave things to Candice. To let her stitch Count up. Agnes could just pack up her things, kick Count in the nuts and be on her way. But .. but .. see, she started this and she needs to finish it. She's the type of person who doesn't trust anyone's work but her own. "Thanks, Petals," she says to the Fairest flower with a scowl -- although the words /are/ sincere. "But I got this. And it's Agnes. Agnes Agnarsson." And with that? She starts stitchin'.
-> >> Agnes to Here << <-=============================================Rolled 6 Successes for an exceptional success. < 1 3 3 3 4 4 5 5 5 6 9 10 10 10 10 10 > ====================================-> >> Wits + Wyrd No Flags << <--> >> Agnes to Here << <-=============================================Rolled 12 Successes for an exceptional success. < 1 2 2 2 2 2 2 3 3 3 3 3 3 4 4 4 4 4 4 5 5 5 5 5 5 5 6 6 7 8 8 8 8 9 9 10 10 10 10 10 10 > =====-> >> Dexterity + Medicine.First_Aid + 6 8-Again and Rote << <--> >> Agnes to Here << <-=============================================Rolled 8 Successes for an exceptional success. < 1 1 2 2 2 2 2 3 3 3 4 4 4 5 5 5 5 5 6 6 6 6 6 7 7 7 8 8 8 9 9 10 10 10 > =====-> >> Dexterity + Medicine.First_Aid + 6 8-Again and Rote << <-Candice smells of flowers, and Count smells of delicious, delicious food. Well, unless you hate him, then he smells of rotting things, but even if you like him a little, in yer secret cold heart... mmm yummy. Candice up close, running her fingers through his bottle-black hair, well, he just wraps one arm around her waist to keep her close to his too-warm body, basking in the mild pampering, and for a moment he forgets that... "Oww!" He's being Poked. "Oww!" "Oww, Oww STOPTHAT!" Count looks, for a moment, genuinely, emotionally hurt by Agnes's anger towards him, her poking and insults, and then her muttering. Look at him! Those big wide, sad kitten eyes. SO INNOCENT. And then the mask starts to crack, and his golden eyes start to take on a manic gleam, fighting for dear life to hold back the laughter, but then he just starts snorting and giggling, like he cant take it, kicking his feet, but HOLDING HIS HAND VERY STILL. When she finishes the stitching, he looks at it, and then to Agnes... and before she can even react, he's leaning in, taking her jaw in one hand, and leaning in to plant a big ole kiss on her lips. SMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOCH And then backs away before she can poison him, again, leaning over to Faux-Whisper to Candice. "Okay I lied a little, there was a spill, and we were fighting,and we fell, and somehow, whatever, my lips tingled and then I felt fucked up fer hours. She's actually not a complete cunt, but oh my god so cranky."
But then there's poking! Candice stiffens as the glass goes to Count's chest-- but there's just poking, so she relaxes, and just...listens, curious and wide-eyed. Agnes is stared at. Scrutinized. Studied. Considered! So emotional. Is that a twitch at her lips, at the insults to Count. Certainly not! But there's such a brilliant smile for Agnes, "As long as you're sure. Thank you for being so...dedicated to helping. I won't forget how wonderfully you've acted." Acted. Not spoken. And hey, then she glances down at poor Count, looking so innocent and sad-- and then reaching to smooch Agnes, making Candice blink again. "I did think you two had some history." She murmurs, before giving Count a slap on his shoulder, "Now you sit still and let Agnes work on your hand, you liar. You're not helping her be any less cranky." She chides. And then kisses his forehead, so she clearly has no idea how the whole reward-punish thing works.
-> >> Agnes to Here << <-=============================================Rolled 0 Success < 2 3 3 4 6 6 6 7 > ============================-> >> Resolve + Composure No Flags << <-The moment she starts stitching, the world falls away and she is singularly focused on the task at hand (HA. Get it? Task at hand. The wound is on his hand. GOD I AM SO FUNNY). Agnes does fine and delicate work, so much so that once he heals there is unlikely to be a scar. When she is done, the Wizened straightens back slightly and for a moment, admires her work. One can almost imagine the mental pat on the back she is giving herself, an inner high-five for a job well-done. And then Count kisses her. It catches her completely off-guard and it's over before it's really had a chance to register; this leaves her wide-eyed and comically confused for a few stretching seconds. 5 .. 4 .. 3 .. 2 .. She throws her things back into the med-kit and slams the lid shut. "I don't need this shit!" she huffs, all red-faced and .. angry? Embarrassed? There's a confusing mix stirred up in there. The Wizened rises to her feet, grabs her stuff and stomps off for the ladder. The job isn't really finished -- she didn't leave him with care instructions! -- BUT SHE CAN'T EVEN WITH HIM RIGHT NOW. And Candice! Candice, as sweet as she is, as nice as she is, as gentle as she is .. SHE IS NOT HELPING. Not with her repeating that she thinks that they have some kind of history. History! Them! As if she would ever .. with him .. NOT IN A MILLION YEARS! The mushroom-lady just storms off and before any entreaties can be made, she's halfway down the ladder. "DON'T HIT ROCKS AT MY FUCKING SHOP!" is the last thing she yells back at the pair but, obviously, that is more directed at Count than Candice. Unless the flower was practicing her golf-swing too. THEN SHE IS JUST AS GUILTY. Harumph.
In the moment after the kiss, Count's attention is on Agnes, intense, patient, predatory, just watching her and the range of emotions that play across her face, eating it up like a meal, savoring it all, the tip of his cerulean tongue pressed to the corner of his mouth. So good. And the Agness breaks and starts to storm off. "What?!" Count looks, and sounds incredulous. "OH COME /ON/!!" he calls "i was saying THANK YOU!!" but already she's far away, and he cant help keep the mirth from his eyes, the tears welling at the corner, from the held back laughter and... soemthing else as he watches her retreat, something he'll keep to himself. The Spring gone, Count looks to the winter at his side and smiles at her. "Well, that was interesting... I think we need to get Lulu a new pool tho." you know, because of all the invisible glass now in it.
"I don't think she likes kisses as thank you's. I don't know why. You seem very good at them." The elemental wonders, shaking her head. She returns Count's smile, "I think you're fond of her." She says, pretty vague on which 'her', adding, "I'll buy it when I go out, and tell Cian to clean it out. For now, we should put a bandage and some wrap on your hand, so it stays clean." She decides, reaching out for COunt's hand, taking a look at Agnes's handiwork. | |
