Difference between revisions of "Audrey Wilson"
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* '''The Lost Alexander No One Knew Was Missing''' - Her mother bailed out of town years ago, telling her family to fuck off with a righteous anger that only teenagers can muster. Apparently, her mother's capacity for holding grudge exceeded coming home to introduce them to Audrey. | * '''The Lost Alexander No One Knew Was Missing''' - Her mother bailed out of town years ago, telling her family to fuck off with a righteous anger that only teenagers can muster. Apparently, her mother's capacity for holding grudge exceeded coming home to introduce them to Audrey. | ||
* '''Don't That Just Pucker Your Right Eye?''' - Don't worry though, Audrey inherited her mother's capacity for sass and vinegar. | * '''Don't That Just Pucker Your Right Eye?''' - Don't worry though, Audrey inherited her mother's capacity for sass and vinegar. | ||
| − | * '''It's Called Kitchen Magic. Don't Make That Face.''' - The Ozarks has its... uh, own spin on what qualifies as legitimate thaumaturgical practice. | + | * '''It's Called Kitchen Magic. Don't Make That Face.''' - The Ozarks has its... uh, own spin on what qualifies as legitimate thaumaturgical practice. |
| + | * '''It's Artisanal, Locally Sourced Ice Cubes.''' - Audrey works at the Badb Catha, where the drinks are hipster expensive and the food is glorious trash. | ||
| + | |||
===Contacts=== | ===Contacts=== | ||
Revision as of 20:57, 31 May 2018
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“I had been born shoved to the margins of the world, sure, but I had volunteered for the pits.”
– Daniel Woodrell
Overview
Amanda Alexander bailed on Fort Tamarack years ago. A particular pitfall to the Alexander way of life had already gotten its hooks in, in the form of a not-yet-full-time addiction to pills. The Alexander method of drying out and cleaning up - aka locking teenaged Amanda in a room on the farm with a sick bucket and jug of water - only pushed the situation over the edge and Amanda left town leaving the spectre of two middle fingers and the unsettled dust of fury in her wake. Somewhere between Fort Brunsett and Little Rock, Arkansas - Audrey was conceived. Her father came from a literal clan of Ozark-bred and buttered Wilsons, where Audrey grew up. After her mother disappeared into her addiction and her father disappeared into a lengthy federal prison term, Audrey and her sister Rosie were raised by their paternal grandmother, Hazel.
Life in the Ozarks as she grew up was a seasonal cycle of summer jobs catering to rich boaters who turned up on Memorial Day, took the town for all it was worth where women, drugs, and liquor were concerned, and disappeared into the mist after Labor Day and then, waiting out the cold, gray, dreary ice storm winters by partying hard with similar teenagers sentenced to a lifetime of this cycle. The one constancy in all this was her family's relationship to the Baliff family and their local folk hero status of coming up from nothing to owning nearly every bar, gas station, and dry cleaner in the county. Everyone worked for the Baliff's in some way in Audrey's family and Audrey's obligation was the use of her Wilson lineage magical talents in keeping the Baliff operation, safe, dry, and high above the water line.
And then, Audrey stopped and considered all the information about her situation she'd been willfully ignoring for almost two decades.
And then, it got weird.
Things Audrey Knows:
♠ How To Work A Dock All Summer And Avoid A Farmer's Tan
♠ How To Do Massive Bong Rips That Impress Your Friends And Neighbors
♠ Flirt Her Way Into Extra Toppings In Her DQ Blizzard
♠ How To Ward A Building
♠ Just How Much Lake of the Ozarks, Missouri Sucks
♠ Just How Much She Won't Go Back
♠ Just How Much She Misses Her Sister Despite These Facts
♠ How To Bury A Body In The Woods
Things Audrey Doesn't Know:
♠ She Doesn't Have Enough Paper In The Universe To Begin Listing That Out
RP Hooks
- The Lost Alexander No One Knew Was Missing - Her mother bailed out of town years ago, telling her family to fuck off with a righteous anger that only teenagers can muster. Apparently, her mother's capacity for holding grudge exceeded coming home to introduce them to Audrey.
- Don't That Just Pucker Your Right Eye? - Don't worry though, Audrey inherited her mother's capacity for sass and vinegar.
- It's Called Kitchen Magic. Don't Make That Face. - The Ozarks has its... uh, own spin on what qualifies as legitimate thaumaturgical practice.
- It's Artisanal, Locally Sourced Ice Cubes. - Audrey works at the Badb Catha, where the drinks are hipster expensive and the food is glorious trash.
Contacts
Soundtrack
Manchester Orchestra - The Silence
There was nothing but quiet retractions
And families pleading, "Don't look in that cabinet
There's far more bad than there's good, I don't know how it got there
Lord Huron - Meet Me In The Woods
I took a little journey to the unknown
And I come back changed, I can feel it in my bones
Now the darkness got a hold on me
Holy darkness got a hold on me
Run The Jewels & DJ Shadow - Nobody Speak
I will punch a baby bear in his shit
Give me lip
I'mma send you to the yard, get a stick, make a switch
I can end a conversation real quick
Logs
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